Thursday, July 10, 2008

Candy Ramadan: Day 21

I was fooled today by Trader Joe's Chocolate Sunflower Seed Drops today... fooled into consuming health food! I mean, the first ingredient listed was chocolate, so I figured they were OK in spite of their sunflower guts. But as I started eating them I felt... odd. Like I was being suspiciously nourished. So I checked the rest of the ingredients list and I saw that there were natural food colorings used! AAAAAAH! I just consumed something with beet powder and spinach juice!

Still, they were OK, though my stomach hurt for a bit due to the vitamins and whatnot. But the thing I liked the best was their texture was so slippery. It felt neat to stick your fingers in the carton. Also I felt like you were probably supposed to put these in something like cookies and not really to eat them straight, like chocolate chips.

Anyway, with a whole tub of these things left, I figured I could put their natural-ness to good use and try to grow a candy tree. So I planted one of each color in some potting soil I had and I put it on my porch. I will keep you updated to the progress of my candy trees.

Update! I finally got a reply from the asshats at Flyer Chocolates:

Dear Sea Hag,

We are sorry that you had a problem, as all of our
bars are shipped to our distributors in good
condition. We will contact our distributor and Alon's,
as there could have been a problem in transit during
the summer heat.

Did you return the product to Alon's for a refund? If
not, please send the empty wrapper and your receipt to
Paris Chocolates, Inc., P. O. Box 1281, Washington, CT
06793, and we will refund your money plus $2.00 for
postage and handling.

If you no longer have the wrapper and receipt, please
provide us with the amount you paid for the bar and
your mailing address and we will send you a refund

If you would like to talk to one of our owners, please
provide your daytime phone number or call us at
800-226-3922 during business hours and leave your

Thank you for bringing this to our attention.

The Chocolatiers at Paris Chocolates, Inc.

OK, I paid like $1.99 for this damn thing, so it's probably not even worth the waste of paper. Should I do it?


Noochie said...

You should demand free candy as reciprocity for this injustice. And be as dramatic about it as possible. And if they refuse, mail them a steaming pile of melted chocolate ... or something that looks like chocolate, at least.

cybele said...

Jeeze, that response from the company is unacceptable! You have to pay to have it replaced?

I do love the Sunny Seed Drops from Trader Joe's. I love them so much I don't buy them any longer since I know I'll eat a whole tub in two days.

Sea Hag said...

Welcome, cybele!

Yeah, I was pretty underwhelmed by that response, I was hoping for free candy. And who the hell would save a candy wrapper for days from a candy that sucked? And now I've got to blow postage to get back my $2. Pppft.

I'm that way with those chocolate-covered fruits they sell at TJs. It's dangerous for me to have them in the house because I'll just snarf them all down in one sitting... or try to, at least.

Anonymous said...

OMG, I am completely mental for Trader Joe's Dilettante chocolate-covered fruits. Just today I had some in the car and they got melty (it was hot!), so I put them in the fridge, and then they fell on the floor and I washed them off and ate some. They had been seriously impaired by exposure to differing temperatures and water, and they shapeshifted from ovoid to rockish, and swapped colors amongst themselves, but they were still good.

At least Paris Chocolates responded. But how can they call themselves Paris Chocolates when they are from a place called Washington, CT?


Sea Hag said...

Yeah, I'm not to be trusted in the candy parts of TJs, especially those chocolate-covered fruits. I would absolutely eat those off the floor without washing them off.

Yeah, I wasn't really impressed with Paris Chocolates, I thought it looked like Jimmy Buffett designed the outer wrapper, which has nothing to do with Paris OR Connecticut. I should e-mail Paris Chocolates and tell them to send me my check for $1.99. Then I could put the money into Operation:Af-Candy-Stan's fund.